Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Dub Dub Weigh In

Okay, before I even begin to announce my WW results for this week, I have some explaining to do...

I did go to WW to weigh in the day before I left for my vacation and I learned that I lost 2.2 lbs, which brought me down to 150.8 for week eight. Which was AWESOME. I was so happy and proud of myself for losing nearly ten pounds in two months. I honestly didn't think I would be at that point and I was stoked.

Then I went on my vacation...

I knew that I would gain on my vacation. I just know myself enough to know that no matter what I do, no matter how hard I try to stay on track, I am just not one of those people who can either maintain or lose on vacation. I just can't be that person no matter how much I wish I could. And if it ever does happen, it's a total fluke.

Anyway, like I said, I knew I would gain a little weight on my vacation, but I wasn't expecting this much:

{Week Eleven}

+ 5.4 lbs
Change since week one: -3.8 lbs
Change since 2006: -33.8 lbs

Am I disappointed? That's an understatement.

The only thing I can commend myself on is that I actually weighed in and faced the music. I was dreading stepping up on that scale because I had no idea where I'd be and even though I'm upset about the outcome, I am SO glad I got it over with and went... but I really wasn't expecting a gain of 5.4 lbs. I was expecting about a 2 - 3 lb gain. When I approached the desk and told the receptionist that I just got back from vacation and was expecting a gain, she said no matter what the gain is, I'll lose it eventually and that it had to at least be somewhat worth it because I was on vacation. When she saw how much I actually gained she told me not to be discouraged and that she knew I would lose it again.

I was TOTALLY discouraged. I was fighting tears as I sat in the meeting... and I was pissed. So totally pissed at myself for not being more careful on my vacation.

The problem is this: when I am at home, I have a routine, I can plan out my meals, I am in total control, but when I'm away from home, I have a lot less choices, I don't have the less fat, less carbs options and the only thing I can control is my portions... which just so happens to be the area I have the least control in. Portion control is my enemy. The first half of the vacation, I was a whole lot more careful about my portions. I only ate 1/2 or 2/3 of my meals and I drank a lot of water. By the second half of the trip I just didn't care as much and the food just got tastier and harder to resist. My willpower was failing me and I gave in to more than I should have, but I was trying to make wiser choices with what I was actually eating.

Apparently it didn't matter.

I was still pretty upset the whole day, but I finally resolved that I can't really change where I am now except to just get back on track and to not give up, which I'm sticking to. I've lost 5 lbs countless times, I'll do it again.

There is one problem, though. I will be going out of town AGAIN on the 27th and won't be back until either the 4th or the 7th of August. Dave has business in New York and I'll be joining him. The good thing about being in NY is that I've been there before several times and have actually lost weight while there and I know I could do it again. I'll be able to eat my own breakfast because the hotel rooms have small kitchens and I can load up on fruits and veggies from the deli across the street. If anything I just hope I stay the same while in NY, but I'll worry about that when I get there.

For now I just have to focus on staying on track, not giving up and just remember how I faltered on my last vacation and hopefully that will give me the motivation to keep going and to keep losing.

Wish me luck, you guys. I need it :(
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